ONLINE DATING

Are Dating Apps the New Way to Truly Find Love

January 30, 2020

It is 2020, practically everything is digital. Ordering food, reaching out to friends, buying clothes, and even grocery shopping are just a few of the many online marvels of the modern age. Everything is at a persons’ fingertips, so it makes sense that people are looking for their true love in the vast world of online dating. Online dating has become widely popular, especially among teens and young adults due to its laid back, zero pressure mentality. However, is online dating actually beneficial, or is it setting people up for failure?

Tinder, Bumble, and Badoo are just a few of the dating apps that have a minimum age of eighteen. Due to its appeal, it is no surprise that teenagers and young adults are flocking to it, with nearly forty percent of Americans using online dating sites like these (eHarmony). However, sites like these allow people to put on a persona of who they want to be, not who they actually are. In fact, it is believed that fifty-three percent of Americans fabricate part of or all of their profile. 

People may do this, in the best-case scenarios, to make themselves seem more attractive or desirable to other people on the site. Whether they lie about their age, height, weight or occupation, they are still giving off a false sense of reality and who they actually are. For example, a popular lie told is a man’s height because those under six foot feel as if women will not give them a chance. Almost every single male Tinder bio says, “I’m [insert height here] because that matters.” Online dating is quite focused on physical appearance, which can be very harmful to a person’s self-image and confidence. Statistics show that a woman’s desirability peaks at the age of twenty-one on these sites (eHarmony). Many people are too busy swiping and liking based on initial reaction, and physical attraction to a person, to read their bio or see if they have anything in common.

In the worst-case scenarios, the person is not who they say they are, or they are currently already in a committed relationship. “About 51% of online daters are already in a long-term commitment”(eHarmony). That would mean that of the forty million Americans using dating sites, twenty million of them are lying or cheating. Now, of course there is the possibility that this happens with people you meet and have relations with in day-to-day life, but if they live in your area you are more likely to come in contact with people who know them and know if they are hiding something.

Even though, there are dangers and toxic traits to the world of online dating, there are potential benefits. Twenty percent of committed relationship begin online, and seven percent of marriages were between couples who met on a dating website (eHarmony). While those percentages seem quite small, that is a large number of people, which shows that there are successes among the horror stories. Online dating sites also take some of the pressure off of meeting someone. It is not face to face, which allows users to get to know someone and think about their responses before they message someone back. This laid back, no pressure feel is the reason so many people are using dating sites, and if something goes wrong in conversation, people can avoid the awkwardness by ghosting.

Online dating sites also allow users to meet people who they normally would not have come in contact with, for example, a person who lives a town over from them, this allows for harsh and easy breakups — ghosting, an ability every person on the internet has with a few simple clicks. Ghosting is the cutting off of contact with a person, across all social media platforms with little to no explanation. With online dating comes a lot of ghosting as people meet new people and move on from those they had previously talked to, or they are just too scared to cut it off. Ghosting is most prevalent among teenagers and those in their early twenties. With online dating a lot of the times the people you talk to are not in the same town as you, making ghosting the easiest escape from a failing conversation. However, ghosting is a way teens are lacking communicating and refusing to give the other party an explanation, which can take a toll on the person who was ghosted’s confidence.  

Dating someone in general is not an easy task and takes a lot of work, and online dating is even harder. It is easy to fall into the addiction of swiping and liking, but users need to remember that behind each photo is an actual person. Be aware of your own intentions  and cautious of others, as you go fishing in this questionable ocean.

Information obtained form eHarmony.com

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